Starboard Port is my creative harbor.
My life is superlative, and I thrive on passion. I travel every chance I get, take numerous bizarre jobs, and I keep the company of an extraordinary group of intelligent critical thinkers who know how to properly celebrate existence. I venture to share with you a tiny sliver of the near-painful joy I find in the human experience along with the trials and tribs of life as a (sometimes) self-employed and rarely unpacked writer/editor/linguist/fish shipper.
~Why am I here?
You’re here, dear reader, because you’re a word nerd who enjoys creativity, travel and a good story.
~What is starboard, what is port and what’s with all these maps?
If you are standing on the prow of your boat, STARBOARD is on your right and shines a green light; PORT is on the left with a red light. Port is a type of fortified wine well suited to hobos. A city which receives ships is also a port. Having worked in the Alaskan seafood industry for many years, I am quite partial to boats and fishing culture.
I also have harbored (get it?) a life-long attraction to literature about tropical wharfs and ports, pirates and deserted islands. I like to think I would have made a formidable she-seaman in centuries past. I can still get lost in a good picaresque misadventure/Tom Waits ballad/Johnny Depp eyeliner flick, and I can’t get enough antique mappery.
~Is it really worth my time to read your blog instead of doing my office work? Can I explain this off if my boss peeps over my shoulder? Are you legit?
YES! I sometimes swear like a sailor, but I am legitimate. Too legitimate to quit. I posses one Bachelor of Arts in Journalism and Mass Communication; one Bachelor of Arts in Spanish; one History minor; and one semi-official Latin American studies concentration…and three bachelors in my bed. Zing!
Foul-mouthed but classically-trained, I strive to ensure accuracy in my reporting. I can make an effective photograph (even some that aren’t my heinie!), edit your grammar (never grammEr), work all sorts of computer programs, and I am even trying to crack codes.
So tell your boss to get up out of your grill; that you are reading accurate, enthusiastic and informative news written by a professional journalist. Point indignantly at the obviously intelligent maps and big words. You may then present links from my Published Work page which are properly formatted and contain no swearing.
All content Copyright 2007-2012 by Jessie M. Waddell
Ask me if you want to use content from my site! I might even say yes.
Please note that the whacked out worldviews and weltanschauung, the condemnations and the recommendations expressed are mine and mine alone. They in no way reflect the opinions of any publication in which my name may appear nor any organization with which I may align nor any of their members, employees, subsidiaries, minions or feudal serfs.
Likewise I shall always strive to remain objective in my critiques regardless of foul mood or hangover. Shitty service, pubey bedsheets, false advertising, etc. shall be treated as such. That’s on you, my hospitality homies. If you come across mistaken information or inaccurate condom vendor locations,
hit me up, and I’ll do my best to rectify.
If you are or have been a gentleman friend, I apologize in advance for impending self-incrimination regarding lying, cheating and manizing and for discussing your crotch in harrowing detail. Some things are inevitable in an abiding quest for stimulation, adventure and truthiness.
Other than that: jump in, crack a brew and enjoy the ride!
Preguntas? Comentario? What? What? The email. Click hyar.
Not into clickables? j e s s i e m w a d d e l l ( a t ) g m a i l ( d o t ) c o m